BPD refers to Borderline Personality Disorder. The invisible BPD refers to the person that suffers from high functioning BPD. This article will be aimed at helping you understand the rationalization of the borderline personality (BP) afflicted with the disorder.
Often times the high functioning BP is very hard to spot unless you are close to the person suffering from the disorder. Unlike low functioning BP’s, they can seem to lead perfectly normal lives. They often times seem well put together and perform well at their jobs. Behind all this seemingly normal behavior is a very unhealthy coping mechanism.
The high functioning BP has a tendency to over rationalize. They can seemingly make sense of almost any situation. You need to listen close as they explain why they might have reacted the way they did to see if their rationalization is rooted in reality or based on almost fuzzy logic. The BP that is doing this will often times try to make the evidence fit what he/she believes already instead of letting the evidence lead to a final conclusion.
An example would be that the BP in your life feels you’re cheating because you were one hour late getting home from work and lately you seemed more distant from them. In actuality you could have a big project at work that has been occupying your mind and keeping you late at work. The BP in your life may come out and accuse you of cheating instead of asking for reasons why you may be late or distant. Understand that this would all stem from his/her fear of abandonment. Even if you give a reasonable explanation and he/she stops fighting with you, it may not be because they believe you but because your argument could be valid and a continued argument would go nowhere. You may notice instead that the BP in your life begins snooping or showing up to your work in attempt to catch you doing the wrong thing that they believe you are doing.
Because the high functioning BP has rationalized everything in their world to fit what makes them comfortable it can be hard for them to notice they have a problem. It can also cause loved ones to be confused and possibly even question themselves. As always the person with BPD needs to seek help and those loved one who are supporting them need to have a support structure around them to lean on.
Paul T. Mason MS, Randi Kreger (2010). Stop Walking On Eggshells Second Edition:Taking your life back when someone you care about has borderline personality disorder
Oakland: New Harbinger Publications, Inc.