There is no need to call the therapist every time you have issues. You’d be surprised how quite efficiently a nicely brewed beer can help you solve any problem you have. All you need to know is what type of beer will do the trick.
It boils down to only two types of beer, home brewed and store bought. I know there are plenty of beers from all flavors, categories and experiments. But in problem solving, you have to look at the escalation of the issue as it is directly proportional to the value of the beer.
Sometimes, the home brew is worth more than the store bought beer. It depends on how good it is and how long it took you to make. Also, it depends on the cost of the store bought beer. A four pack for a $1.99 will only solve a problem comparable to breaking someone’s porch swing, as long as you are also offering to help fix it.
Now, store bought beer can handle quite a few problems depending on how good it is and how much it costs. If the beer you buy is worth $10 a bottle, then that can handle a problem the size of wrecking your friend’s car. You’ll need more than one bottle though. Be ready to empty your wallet on that trip to the store.
If you’re starting to see how this works, let’s start looking at some problems and deciding what type of beer it would take to get the wink of forgiveness. If you ran into your best friend and his wife at the grocery store and they were showing you their newborn baby, you’ll need a case of your best home brewed beer if you laughed. You’ll need two cases of your best friend’s favorite if you gasped in fear.
If the problem is a small one like breaking his car window with a golf ball because you don’t know how to keep it on the fairway, you’ll need a few top notch glasses at the club. If you got into a fight with his cousin, it will take a few bottles of your home brew. Are you seeing how this works?
Some things are harder to forgive than others, but beer always brings you back together. Remember, your friends will always forgive you. So, don’t be afraid to do what’s right and offer the directly proportionate donation of beer that matches the size of the mess you made.