Review of J.Edgar Movie

Remember when Eastwood made westerns and they were short and fun and had a lot of horses and saloons and gunfights. Here is a suggestion Clint. Play to your strength. Go back to making westerns. In fact I think you would do a hell of a job with remaking Death of a Gunfighter. Great movie.

But please Clint do not make any more movies like J.Edgar. How long was it – six, seven hours? Or maybe it just seemed that long. J.Edgar finally dies and I am happy. I get to go home. Oh no, we can’t end with a parting shot of J.Edgar lying on the floor nude. We have to go on and on and involve Nixon and J. Edgar’s secretary and J.Edgar’s lover, Clyde, hugging the body on the floor. Please!

And who was your make-up artist. Did you make a deal with Ronald McDonald? Bozo the Clown? Helen Keller? Clyde, played by who cares, doesn’t look like an old man as he ages. He looks like a zombie, which may have been a good idea as a zombie, a super hero, a few gun shots might have drastically improved the movie.

What did this movie teach me? Never leave my flask at home.

I am not a big fan of Leonardo DiCapio, in fact my pet name for him is DiCrapo. He is a good actor, not a great actor and he doesn’t have the ability to carry a movie over, what six or seven hours long. I don’t think he was ever off the screen. He was in every scene. Here is Leonardo imitating a young J, Edgar, Here is Leonardo imitating a middle-age j. Edgar. Here is Leonardo imitating an old J. Edgar. Here is the audience looking for the nearest exit.

What does this movie strive to be? A history of the FBI, a tribute to J. Edgar, a love story between J.Edgar and Clyde? Should this movie have been called Psychos on Parade? Who knows? Mr. Eastwood didn’t. He kept rolling film or whatever they roll nowadays, until he had a mishmash of what? Who knows. An ADHD person has more focus than this movie.

Thinking about seeing J.Edgar? Sure go ahead. But bring a flask. Or two.

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