You’ve dreamed about this day from when you were a little girl. You planned out every detail from the flowers and favors, to the invitations and wedding dress… The day has finally arrived and your dreams are coming true. You are marrying the man you love and you both will spend the rest of your lives together.
People get married for many different reasons. Some get married to their high school sweetheart, their first love. Others get married because they get pregnant and feel they need to get married for their baby. While some even get married just to unite two families that is good for business. Whatever the reason may be, couples out there get married and think they are going to live happily ever after. This isn’t a fairy tale, this is real life. Face it, nowadays there are just as much people getting divorced as there are getting married. What is the reasoning behind all of the divorces?
Even though every couple have their own personal reasons why their marriage didn’t work, there are some common reasoning that many do divorce. Given that, according to the Divorce Magazine, the U.S. averages about 49% of marriages end in a divorce. While the lowest divorce rate resides in Washington DC at 1.7% per 1,000 people. Nevada holds the highest rate of 6.4% per 1,000 people.
Here are the top 5 reasons I believe marriages end in a divorce.
Finances
With the economy now, many families are struggling. They are struggling to keep a roof over their heads as well as putting food on the table every night. Many have gotten laid off due to companies downsizing and either can’t find work or have to work 2-3 jobs just to make ends meet. Financial hard times put a huge strain on marriages. They get frustrated and end up fighting all the time about everything. Financial hardship break up many marriages.
Lack of Communication
If two people can’t communicate with each other, how are they supposed to share their lives with one another? Communication is extremely important in every situation. It is important in friendship, parenting, jobs, and marriages. The inability to communicate with each other most likely wasn’t an issue at the time of the wedding. It could have developed due to the couple growing apart, changes in career paths, or their lives are just too busy and they have forgotten how to sit down and have a conversation. Without communication, there is no relationship.
Infidelity
The act of cheating on your spouse happens every day all over the world. Whether they are married or just dating, it doesn’t matter. Some people do it all the time, and think nothing of it. The fact is that, if someone cheats once, they are most likely to do it again. Infidelity is a very common cause for a divorce. Many people are unable to forgive the unfaithful partner and have no other choice but to file for a divorce. Or if they should try to give their spouse another chance, many times it will still end in a divorce because trust is lost.
Differences in Parenting
Sometimes, husbands and wives come from different types of family background. They are both raised differently and may also have different religions. They get married and start their own family. Then the parenting starts. If they have different views on how their child should be raised and they can’t compromise, this can cause a lot of friction in the household. If their parenting styles don’t get figured out from when their baby is young, as their child gets older, more and more issues will have to be dealt with. If one parent is going to say yes while the other says no, it will cause a lot of confusion in their child and also spark many fights. Being a parent is the hardest job you will ever have to do in your entire life and if you can’t come to a middle ground, it is your child and your marriage that will suffer. Eventually one person will give up and file for a divorce.
Physical and Emotional Abuse
When spousal abuse exists in a relationship, it can be very dangerous. If it is physical abuse, the spouse that is being physically abused is stuck in a very dangerous situation. They may be afraid to leave in the beginning, but hopefully they will eventually build up the courage to leave their abuser and seek help. Sometimes just the act of leaving can push the spouse over the edge and even up killing their partner.
Emotional abuse is just as bad as physical abuse. Even though they are not harming you physically, they are hurting you inside. They can make you feel like you are nothing and they can even drive you into contemplating suicide just to escape the daily put downs that make them feel so small. The best thing that can be done is to leave the abuser and file for divorce. Although many times they are also afraid because they are so brainwashed into thinking that they are nothing and they would not be able to find anyone else that would put up with them like he/she does.
It is very sad that so many marriages end in a divorce. Although, in some situations it is a better choice to get a divorce instead of being unhappy in a marriage that neither of you want anymore. Or if abuse exists, a divorce is the smart way to go. While for other people who didn’t think marriage through and decided to cheat on their spouse or just don’t want to be with that person anymore, they are the ones that give marriage a bad name. Marriage is the union between two people who love each other and want to spend the rest of their lives together. They are willing to do whatever it takes to make it work, to never give up on the other and always be there whether it is fun times or hard times. Hopefully one day our divorce rates will go down after everyone takes their vows seriously.