Drunk, Moody Roomie to Other Roomie: “I’m Going to Crush Your Head.”

Boston, MA-Late Friday evening, 34-year-old engineer Mark Coolidge came home from work and, after drinking a few beers and catching up on the news, informed his roomie, 26-year-old freelancer Jack Patch, that he was going to crush his head.

“First he pulled me outside to discuss how we could somehow magically solve all of the world’s problems, and then when I mentioned that maybe we should start by raising taxes on the rich, he suddenly went all ballistic on me by telling me that he was going to crush my head,” Jack told reporters, still visibly shaken from the previous night’s unexpected events.

“The crazy thing about it all was that he showed no emotion. I would have figured he was doing a deadpan comedy bit if I didn’t already know that he has no sense of humor whatsoever.”

When questioned by police about the incident, all Mark had to say was, “I am crushing your head!”

Moral of the story: It’s a long story involving my very-funny roomie, too much beer, and Warren the “cock” Buffett, lol.

Moral of the story #2: Big ups to ‘Kids In The Hall’ (88-94).

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