It is easy to find silly scientific studies but I may have found The DUMBEST STUDY OF 2011. And considering all the dumb studies out there, being THE DUMBEST STUDY is quite an honor.
The study starts off semi-normal. “Older individuals’ complaints about memory lapses such as having trouble remembering recent events may indicate that they are experiencing cognitive problems that are greater than typical age-related changes.”
But to be blunt, if you are having trouble remembering recent events, such as going to the bathroom or finding where you placed your coffee, I can bet that you have some cognitive problems.
Andt the way the study was conducted will make you think twice about how much money we channel into stupid research.
Here is how the study was conducted.
“To see if certain memory complaints might be linked with potentially serious problems related to memory and thinking, investigators telephoned 16,964 older women (average age of 74 years) and asked them seven questions related to memory complaints, followed by various questions that assessed cognitive function.”
Excuse me, but if the average age was 74, how many women did you call that were OVER 74. Toss a few 90 years old in there and your study falls apart. Let’s face it. At 90 you are not worried about cognitive function, you are worried about where your next breath is coming from.
And if the average participation in your study is 74, you have a major problem. I am sure that over half the conservations went like this.
Researcher: Hell we are taking a survey..
Woman: A hay ride?
Researcher: A survey about cognitive function?
Woman : What?
Researcher: A survey about Cognitive Function.Woman; Well, I am pretty busy for a hayride to Cognitive Junction. Hey where is Cognitive Junction anyway….?
The authors of the study noted, “”These findings suggest that clinicians may need to differentiate between the types of memory complaints their patients have, as some are likely due to normal aging whereas others are worrisome for possible cognitive decline,””
So what. If you are over 74, how much longer do you have to decline anyway?
Now – what award did I give this study?? Hmm, let me see if I can remember….
Wiley-Blackwell (2011, September 19). Some memory complaints in the elderly may be warning signs of cognitive problems. ScienceDaily. Retrieved September 20, 2011, from http://www.sciencedaily.com /releases/2011/09/110915083727.htm