Being fat is like the cool thing to do these days (is he for real?). Putting on the fat is one thing, which looks easy (don’t you just love those rolls of fat), but losing the fat is the next tough step, which is not cool, bmm bmm.
They’ve found a new fancy word for fat…’obesity’. It’s like wearing a new edition, new improved shirt or dress. Obesity sounds pretty hip-and-happening doesn’t it. I think I’m going to get obese. That’s if I’m already obese, I don’t know, ‘doc’. Imagine they had the King and Queen in the land called obesity. It could pass for the title of a town or place couldn’t it, compared to ‘fat’, ‘Yeah, I just live down the road at Fat’. Ok we’ll make it fair, there can be a town called Obesity and town called Fat, there, happy.
Now there is a new version of the bloody word fat… ‘phat’ (what the?). The words just keep coming don’t they. More food, more weight, more ideas, more words, more fat; it’s like spreading the love, like spreading the fat. Now Phat sounds hip-and-happening, and yes it’s all-happening here, ‘pump up the phat’. I know, obesity can be for our mum and dad’s generation, or like going to fine-dining, and phat can be for the youngsters, like going to Hungry Jacks (what about Hungry Jill’s, like Jack and Jill). But talking about being phat is one thing, getting the VIP treatment because of it is another thing. So are you fat or phat? Phat is like fat, cool and all of the above. Sorry, skinny dudes are out here. I think this is your chance fat people. If you are fat, and even more love being fat, now is the time to step it up to the ‘phat-ness’.
It seems some females hate the fat and the males love the fat, sorry obese, obese, the word is now obese. One thing is for sure, ‘in fatness or in health’, ‘in big-ness or in skinniness’, the mirror is a fat-obsessed persons best friend – ‘do you think I look skinny in this dress’ (females), ‘Am I bloody huge in this tight shirt’ (males). I tell you what females, you want to know something. Some, if not most men like the fat, your big…..and your big….. (you work it out); they just stop and stare, and….and….and. You see, skinny is still sexy and looks fantastic (fantastic, that’s a big word), but its, well, safe. It is less to look at, less to grab (ok maybe bedtime), less to worry about.
These ‘big’ female and male models are a good thing, don’t you think. Where have they been all this time. Don’t they look great. Watch out all those catwalks and tv programs…it’s bigger than big yawl. The men are probably agreeing right now, bringing in the big front row forwards from football; but the look on the females faces is priceless, ‘is he for real? Skinny, skinny, skinny (females chanting).