Looking at her watch, Emma sighs
It’s almost 8.00pm…her stomach churns.
“He’ll be here soon; be strong, girl,” she tells herself.
She sips the last of her drink and looks at her knuckles…
Her hands are white, her throat is dry; suddenly, it’s chilly.
She looks up, and there he is.
Tall and build, handsome as always, his charm spreading everywhere in the room.
Emma is cringing. Her heart is beating fast.
She tries to rub her hands and pull her scarf lower,
Even still she’s cold, and scared!
Looking at him advance her table, she finds herself wondering.
Is this the man who swept her off her feet?
Is he the man who made her pain go away and her fears seem so small?
What happened to that? The security, the joy and laughter, the care,
The tenderness, the warmth, the beautiful skies……..
Oh she knows; she had a dark past which, when he found out, infuriated him.
Now he won’t forgive her, he wants nothing to do with her.
She has apologized too many times, but he won’t listen.
He’s hurting, she understands,
But she knows she has changed.
She knows she’s not that person anymore.
She knows she loves him,
She knows she can make him the happiest man alive,
She has tried to tell him that, she has begged at his feet,
She has fought for him; she has given her heart to him.
But still, he has insulted her,
Thrown her out and told her she doesn’t deserve him.
She feels she can’t blame him; after all she is the black sheep.
She is trying to understand him; he really did love her;
He really did try to forgive her; He really did try to stay with her.
But his heart gave way, and he can’t have her anymore.
Her eyes are clouding with tears, her heart is pouring,
There is a pain so sharp like she has been wounded afresh.
“Oh God, give me strength. Let things be okay,” she hears herself whisper.
She chokes back tears, letting air out slowly, she composes herself.
“Looking good, Emma,” he says, pulling her out of her deep thoughts
“Y…Yeah, Hi Derek,” She listens to her voice, its husky.
“Damn,” she curses softly
“Let’s just sign the papers, okay,” he says
She looks at him, mouth dry, she realizes that there is no need for words
It’s all gone…. she makes a mental note as she shakes his hand Sitting down,
she waits patiently as he pulls papers from his briefcase He pushes them towards her,
she looks at them…the last traces of her four year marriage!
She looks up; he’s watching her, a smack at the corner of his mouth.
She picks up a pen, she feels sick!
She closes her eyes and breathes out slowly.
Flipping the papers, she finds the strength to sign.
She doesn’t need to read, she just has to sign.
She is through; she knows what she has done…
She knows he is leaving, but she won’t look up
All she knows is that she loves him still…….