5 Funny Twitter Accounts You Should Follow

Twitter can be a great way to keep in touch with friends and stay on top of the latest news, but it can also be the source of some good laughs if you are following the right people. Here are 5 great accounts you should follow if you are looking for some smiles the next time you log in.

1. First World Pains @FirstWorldPains

This account provides many daily “observations” about the trials and tribulations of living in the modern world. Sometimes it seems as though they are watching me and writing down exactly what I am thinking. The tweets are funny, sarcastic, and the perfect way to remind yourself that those “big deals” throughout your day really aren’t that bad after all.

Sample tweets:

It’s been my birthday for 20 minutes and no one’s written on my facebook wall yet.

The restaurant doesn’t have their hours online, so I had to use Google Street View to squint at the sign on their door.

That was my favorite song…then Kids Bop covered it…

2. Conan O’Brien @ConanOBrien

Conan O’Brien shortly joined twitter after the whole Tonight Show debacle, and it’s been funny one liners ever since. While he doesn’t always talk about his show, you can hear about his performances, travels, and general life observations by following his account. The laughs just keep coming.

Sample tweets:

I wonder how Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann are celebrating the 5th of July?

Every 666 years there’s a mystical 2-day convergence between Toyotathon and Lobsterfest.

My son asked me where babies come from, and to distract him I said “some day we’re all going to die.”

3. Stephen Colbert @StephenAtHome

Stephen Colbert is one of the funniest people of late night, so it makes sense that he has one of the funniest twitter accounts online. Stephen is in full character on this account so you can expect the same type of political analysis and shameless self promotion. If you love his show, Stephen often tweets about things he has recently covered. Stephen Colbert, with his countless fans who will do most anything at his beck and call, is what twitter is all about – communicating with people for the greater good, even if it is to fund his own hilarious antics.

Sample tweets:

If the Earth’s getting warmer, maybe it’s because God’s giving us a tan so we look great when we get to Heaven.

We could be in for a double-dip recession. Which is terrible: I wanted mine with sprinkles.

I forget, when you’re scrapbooking is it “paste before sticker, never felt sicker” or the other way around?

4. Jim Gaffigan @JimGaffigan

Comedian Jim Gaffigan blends hysterical comments about life, his family, and pop culture with personal photos and stories from his travels. The celebrities on twitter can seem like some well paid marketing person types their 140 characters of wisdom for them, but Jim Gaffigan is funny and relevant all by himself. You can get a few laughs and learn more about this comedian by following his account.

Sample tweets:

I’d like to congratulate the Greeks on winning the yogurt wars. The economic wars, not so much.

Ask me about my Tempur-Pedic. Then ask my wife why there are 4 kids in it every morning. Now enough with your questions, I’m tired.

I guess Ultimate Frisbee is easier to say than “only team sport people play with a Frisbee”.

5. Texts From Last Night @TFLN

Texts From Last Night is a popular website where actual funny text messages are anonymously posted. The twitter account highlights some of the best. Some of the texts are outrageous, but some might just hit a little close to home. Either way, it’s definitely good for a few laughs and some “I’m glad that wasn’t me” moments.

Sample tweets:

(267): Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for Fridays

(303): Why is there bacon braided in my hair

(540): If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.

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