There’s “pretty food,” there’s gourmet food, and then there’s this. And this IS beautiful! A complete meal in a bowl, a full day of food in one sitting! Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce you to the “Slinger.”
My Sunday morning motorcycle breakfast gang and I travel off the beaten path to patronize small town cafes and diners, rural beacons in a sea of culinary darkness, to sample and refuel on the local cuisine.
This is real man food. Not yogurt and fresh fruit for an office worker, or a “suit”, but a meal for someone in work clothes, someone who actually looks good in a Mack Truck or NASCAR hat. Or, as the case may be, someone in black leather with studs. That, my friends, would be us.
Slingers are only served in the best high-class places such as this, as you can tell by the chic, contemporary Formica tabletop.
A Slinger is:
Fried potatoes and onions, covered with:
2 thick sausage patties, covered with:
2 eggs, “your way”, covered with:
Chili, covered with:
Shredded cheese, and optional:
If this is too much, you can tone it down by replacing the chili with white sausage gravy, and it becomes a “Slammer.”
It’s nutritionally complete with all the foods groups covered. Quite healthy, as you can see, it is served with wheat toast just in case you’re still hungry. Tabasco sauce is de rigueur when eating a Slinger, it adds to that rosy glow that keeps you warm even on the coldest of winter days. A handful of Tums 30 minutes later and you’ve also increased your calcium intake for the day.
Slingers are mostly a Midwest kind of thing, although there are regional variations. In The South, you can get something similar but grits are in there somewhere. In the Desert Southwest, a plate of Huevos Rancheros is the order of the day.
If you watch the cooking shows on cable, you’ve undoubtedly seen the “big food” and “super spicy” food challenges. Those are just wrong… food should be enjoyed and craved, something you want to repeat and pass on to your friends with a smile and an “I’ll take you there,” rather than sending you into recovery.
If you ever see a slinger on a café or diner menu, give it a shot. You’ll become a convert and be infused with super powers for the rest of the day. And besides, when was the last time breakfast put a smile on your face?