How to Become What You Have Always Wanted to Be

WITHOUT STRUGGLE THERE IS NO PROGRESS. If you are not struggling than you are not moving forward, not attempting to better yourself at whatever it is you are working towards. You are either stuck or have already quit because the struggle to achieve what you’ve always wanted seems beyond your means, or maybe you let somone tell you that they know you better than you do and they dont think you have the guts, the smarts, the strength, or whatever it takes to get what you want and you believed them. Life is simple, you can do anything you want, but we discourage ourselves and judge ourselves by what others think about us and this holds us back. It can be painfull to fail in the eyes of our family or friends and the thought of failure is enough to scare most from ever even trying, the humiliation is worse then physical pain for some. The strong however chose to fight through this pain, the pain of not knowing whether they will make it or not, the physical pain and the daily grind to bring you slowlly step by step to where you want to be, because the stong person knows that at the end of pain is success. Nothing good comes from holding yourself back because of how others think you should be, only you know what you can become and as long as you know that you CAN then it doesnt matter if they cant see it yet. Because once the struggle is over you wont even care that you have proved it to them, you will know all along all you can do is prove it to yourself. “There is no passion to be found by playing small, in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living” -Nelson Mandela

Affirmation- This technique was used by Muhammad Ali when he used to say to himself “I am the greatest”. The idea of affirmations are to take a positive statement and repeat it in your mind so often that they become a part of your way of thinking about yourself and the way you see the world. You should make up your own affirmations for your personal goals to help you develop the traits and behavior you wish to have in order to become what you want to be. To harness the power of affirmations you have to repeat them to yourself everyday, saying them aloud is even more effective and you can also write them on notes around the house. Some good affirmations are “When I breath, I inhale confidence and exhale timidity”, “I love meeting strangers and approach them with boldness and enthusiasm”, “I love challenges, they bring out the best in me”. Go ahead and make up your own or search for others that you might find help you. Visualization- You can use visualization as a powerful tool to see yourself being successful at your goals and dreams in any amount of diverse situations, In fact many athletes use visualization as a part of there training. They use this to create renewed mental awareness, and a heightened sense of well being and confidence because they have already seen themselves achieving there goals, with mental rehearsal your mind and body become trained to perform the skill and outcome you imagined. While visualizing always focus on the positive outcome, most people visualize every day without even knowing it, but they are more focused on there worries of what might happen in a situation. Think only of yourself achieving what you want not of what might stand in the way, the only obstace that stands in your way is yourself not thinking your good enough or the fear of failure which is irrelevant and a learning experience. Confidence- This is probably the most important factor of them all. Just like the picture of the house cat who looks in the mirror and see’s a lion, it does not matter how others see you, what matters most is how you see yourself. “It is most important in life not necessarily to be stong, but to feel stong” -Primo Levi. Confidence can only come from yourself and you can only become unconfident if you let others tell you that you cant do something and then begin to believe them. If you feel unconfident you can always “fake it till you make it”, faking confidence can lead to becoming confident and people will not know the difference. Remember you are strong, and you are the only person that can hold yourself back. Focus- You can not achieve what you want if you dont work at it daily and keep a sharp and focused mind. It can be difficult at times to stay on track and not get distracted by things that lure you away from your goals, but staying focused in the end will benefit you far more than the distractions. This is a technique that I like to use to increase focus while writing or thinking. Find a comfortable place to sit with good posture and do not allow yourself to move, draw your attention away from any distractions and focus only on the task at hand. You can focus on your breath while doing this and you will notice how you begin to figet less and feel sharper, keep your focus on being creative and positive thoughts. Exercise- This is for obvious reasons it keeps you healthy and gives you more energy to chase your goals expecially if they require being in good shape. It also boosts your mood, if you need to let off some steam I would suggest to throw some punches at the heavy bag. While punching dont imagine someone else imagine it is yourself and you are fighting your fear, your lack of willpower, or whatever is holding you back, imagine the more you swing the stronger you get and the more the fears dissapear. Also when you are in good shape and you look good, then it is most likely that you will feel good about yourself. Have Charisma and Be Very Sociable- The most important thing about having charisma is to be relaxed, it is all about how you project yourself to others and if you are calm and tranquil people will be attracted to you much more than if you are anxious, unhappy, or angry. Look confident and keep good eye contact, as well as always seem interested in the person and always keep giving a genuine smile, it is contagious. Also portray good body language as you speak, and dont be afraid to talk to anyone. Dont make a conversation something fearfull, make it something fun and a great experience to meet new people. Practice it by talking to others anywhere you go, think of jokes to say, questions to ask, or compliments to give. If you are at ease with yourself in the conversation and can even make jokes about yourself then you will most definitelly draw others to you. You can even practice in the mirror your gestures, your tone, how you carry yourself and so forth, this will definitelly help you towards your goals if most everyone you talk to likes you. “The reason I talk to myself is that im the only one whose answers I accept.”- George Carlin. Keep Learning and Growing- You should never stop learning after all that is what life is all about, to learn and to grow to become an all around better person and to aspire to your highest potential. Whether it may be learning a new language, reading a new book, or mastering a new skill, this will all help you grow and expand your horizons. There is so much to learn and there is no way possible you can know it all, but you should try and teach yourself what you think you should learn to help you in the path you have chosen to walk. I wish to create new inventions, write books and novels, and become a music artist. At the age of 18 I have so much still to learn and have set many goals for myself but still take them day by day. It has always been my dream to write new stories with great imagination, and to create something that will be around and possibbly help the world long after im gone.

Many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.” -Chris McCandless. I am not sure what your goals and aspirations are in your life, but I wish and hope for you to become the best at what you know you are. There is nothing worse than hiding the fact that you could be something great if only you put in the effort and ignored the negative response from others in your doing so. We cant change the world unless we change ourselves, I wish you the best of luck and may God bless you.

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