Kids with Low Self-Confidence: Signs to Look For

Self-confidence is such an important trait to have as an adult as it more often than not yields success and happiness in an adult’s professional and personal life alike. As parents, we would all like to think that our kids are growing into self-confident adults with each passing day, but this is not an assumption you want to make blindly. In fact, if you spend some time looking at your child more closely, you may be surprised to find that he or she shows signs of low self-confidence. So just what are some of these signs that indicate your child may have a self-confidence issue? Here are a few:

Requiring Perfection. It’s great to want to be perfect at everything you do, but beating yourself up when you are not perfect at something is a sign that low self-confidence may be at play. The fact is that while it’s great to aim high, children should also have realistic expectations and should understand that striving for perfection and being perfect at all things are different. It’s often better to aim for your best effort than to expect perfection all the time.

Making Excuses. Many people who lack self-confidence feel as though they just are not good enough at what they do. So when they are faced with any type of criticism, even constructive criticism, they feel as though they need to justify their actions or make excuses. Likewise, they will attempt to explain away their actions and behavior even when it has not been a topic of conversation as well and will broach the subject themselves.

Proclaiming Greatness. It’s great to toot your own horn from time to time, but children who are constantly telling friends and family that they are the best at this and that often actually feel on a deeper level that they are not the best at it. If you regularly hear your child saying that he or she is great at different things or better than his or her siblings or peers at different things, this may be a sign of a self-confidence issue.

A Look at Body Language. Body language is often a strong indicator of a low level of self-confidence. While someone’s words may say, “I’m better than you,” or they may constantly be making excuses about why something happened in a certain way, body language often tells the tale of how they are feeling on the inside. If your child can often be found with his or her arms crossed in front of him, or with his or her head down or shoulders slumped over, these are indicators that he or she is feeling less than confident.

These are a few of the signs that may indicate your child has a low level of self-confidence. Keep in mind that once you have identified low self-confidence in your child, there are a variety of different steps you can take to help your child build some self-confidence. Identification of the issue, though, is the first step.

Here are a few other articles written by this author:

How Positive is Your Parenting?

Helping Your Kids Through Fights with Friends

Kids and Friend Drama: When to Step In

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