In the case of incest where childhood sexual abuse is carried out upon a young child for years, the damages are always profound. Living in the same home with your perpetrator and being repeatedly at his disposal can definitely wreak havoc upon the psyche of any child who is abused in this manner.
The Loss of Innocence
I have watched young children at play throughout my own recovery from childhood sexual abuse. The carefree abandon that I’ve seen upon the happy faces of these children is in sharp contrast to the photos of my own childhood. As I have looked back at old photographs of myself at various ages and stages of growth and development, I saw one constant and that was the face of an unhappy child. The photographs revealed fear and sadness and yes, the loss of innocence. It seems I was always looking over my shoulder to see if the world I lived in was a safe place. Sadly, it was not safe.
Regaining a Childhood
It might seem strange to some who have grown up free of abuses in their own childhood, but even as adults, we can definitely regain that lost childhood. As a part of our healing journey, we can glean pieces of our lives that were not as they were “supposed” to be. Watching little children at play is one way of acknowledging our own pain and loss. Playing with our own children is a way of enjoying childhood in ways that we could not when we were young. Allowing our hearts to soften and observe the pure joy and innocence of children at play can be a healing moment for each of us. And remember, amusement parks and theme parks are designed for adults as well as children. Ride the merry-go-round, either with your children or grandchildren, or just ride it by yourself for the sheer joy of doing it. Give yourself permission to have fun!
Give Time, Time
Overcoming the affects of childhood sexual abuse is a daunting task, but it can be done. Give yourself all the time you need in order to heal. I have a friend who is always saying, “Give time, time.” That is great advice. Find areas of your own life where you know you missed out on something earlier in life and seek ways to recover what is missing. Become an active participant in your own healing. Therapists are always a great help, but we can also seek ways to bring the healing that we need into our hearts and minds. I found the greatest help was in allowing God to touch those deep soul wounds and provide avenues for my healing to happen. He has always been faithful to walk me through every painful memory of my past and bring the healing that only He can bring. May God richly bless you as you pursue your healing.
Source:
My Life