Once upon a time, my parents lived happily together. Together, we lived in one house, with three kids and a dog. Once upon a time, we had shared memories, of mom worrying too much and dad trying to cook, but it seems like one day that all went away. Between having two jobs and taking care of the kids, my parents never had time to be with each other like when they were younger. Maybe, they just grew apart, maybe it was fate, and maybe it was just two lazy adults who could never seem to work out their differences.

From what I could tell, my mom loved my dad and he loved her, but something happened in the process of wanting that perfect family, destroyed it.

The first day of school was the hardest for me. Mom was constantly calling me, that way I don’t forget something absurd, but I knew that she just wanted to make sure I would pick up the phone when she called.

When the divorce happened, my parents changed. My mom seemed to realize that her children, with the man that she has no sorrow for, are the only substance she has left to cling onto anymore. By her realizing that, she became constantly worried. She seemed like she cared most about me, I was a senior in high school, her first girl, and if she lost me, she would crash. My mom was like a female dog when it came to her precious children, very territorial.

My dad’s reaction to the divorce was a negatively affective to all of the children. He started to drink excessively, and swore to little Carter that Mom will never live a happy life, if it’s the last thing he does. So, just imagine how my first day of school went, when it all started at my dad’s house.

First thing I have to do, is to call Cain, ever since we’ve been engaged, I’ve been his alarm clock. It seems something silly to do, but it doesn’t bother me very much, it’s just a routine to me now.

Riiiiiiinnnnnnnnnggggggg, Riiiiiiinnnnnnnnngggggggggggg. “Hey, you’ve reached Cain’s phone. Here comes the beep, you know what to do with it.” Great, I got the voicemail. That was the very last thing I wanted to hear. I was thinking more along the lines of: Hey, babe. Thanks for waking me up. Oh, don’t worry about how you look today, you always look amazing. What am I kidding though? As much as I truly love Cain, he’s still a boy. Boys can’t get everything perfect. I think I’ll give him about fifteen minutes before I call again.

Dad’s house is going into a black hole of chaos. Carter isn’t waking up; my older brother is redoing his senior, again. Constant bickering is going on in the James house hold right now. I have to get out of the house; I rush Carter so I can drop him off at his school, and head to mine.

I was walking into the school, the same rusty lockers with pale green paint pealing off the moldy walls, which now give a musty smell. Cain head towards me, with a huge grin on his face, and his rugged down look that he pulls off more than anyone else I know.

I’ve been so confused about the engagement, and I’m too frightened to say anything to him about it.. We were engaged a month before my parents divorce, and we neglected to tell them. They were having so many fights and I didn’t want to be the reason why they had another. Now, I’m afraid my dad will give me the lecture of ‘marriage being hell on earth’ and ‘being pregnant isn’t a legit reason to marry these days’ as if I was pregnant. Then he’ll say something about God not wanting people marrying an unbeliever, while he’s downing the bottle of vodka for the day.

I’m going to tell my mom first, I think she’ll take it better. Then, with Cain, I’ll tell my dad.

I love Cain, We’re engaged, and I’m getting married. I’m not going to live the same life as you and mom, Dad. I need to make my own mistakes, and you can’t do anything about it. I’m 18 now. I want you to be there, but I don’t want you being unsupportive because what happened with you and mom. That’s what I’ll tell him.

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