Jeff, the Aliens, and Bob

–No, really sergeant-The aliens took me! And my friend, Bob, too!

–So where’s this Bob, now?

–I don’t know! The little men I their ship took him away!

–Where does Bob live? Does he have any family?

–He lives-lived-with me. He has no family. We’ve been best friends for years. We met when I went up to Burkettsville for work. He volunteered at the library.

–So there’s really no one to give any credence to the existence of Bob.

–There’s pictures of him at my house. I can show you! That’ll help us find him, too, once you can see what he looks like!

–You still haven’t given us any real evidence of your having been abducted by aliens, so ascertaining whether Bob is-or was-living at your house would at least give us somewhere to start. Even though it will most likely just be a routine Missing Persons report.

–Mr. Stanley, do you have any concrete evidence at all to back-up your claim about this abduction?

–Yes, ma’am, I do. As I was trying to tell your partner-

–There’s no need for snippiness, here. We are trying to help you.

–Oh, sure — That’s why you’ve been all staring off into space when I’ve tried to tell you my story! You’re paying more attention to that clock up there than to me! A living, breathing, human self!

–Mr. Stanley, please. Recriminations will get us nowhere-

–I’m not a criminal!

–Mr. Stanley, please just tell us what you know about any kind of evidence you may have.

–Thank you, ma’am. I-what was I saying?

–You had started to tell us about your concrete evidence.

–Right! Well, it’s not actually concrete-very little comes in concrete out here, you know-but you can see it!

–Mr. Stanley –

–Right, right — Anyways, when I escaped from the ship, I found some little pieces of the ship. They’re metal, not concrete. All futuristic-looking and what have you. And I have a GPS, and it records where I’ve been, so that should show that I left the ground!

–Look here, Stanley: None of this really proves you were taken by some kind of other-worldly being or whatever. So where are the doodads you say you got from the ship?

–I don’t just say so, mister. I really have these things. They’re like little injectors, I think — And I have a divot in the back of my neck, where I think they stuck something –

–Mr. Stanley, can you tell us anything about how these people looked? The ones you say took you?

–There were three of them who showed up in the woods behind my house. Bob and I had heard some loud noises and such coming from that way a few minutes before, and that’s why we went looking out there. At first we just thought they were folks from town, who’d maybe gotten lost-they looked — from far enough away — they looked just like regular folks.

–Just folks, huh?

–Yes, sir. Just like anyone else looks when it’s getting to be late evening and all the shadows are coming together. It’s real beautiful about that time — So anyways, Bob and I grabbed our jackets, I grabbed my wood-axe-you know, just in case-and Bob picked up a splitting hammer for the same reason, and we headed out to see who they were and if they needed any help.

–Did they?

–I assume not because as soon as we got out there to the treeline, all there was was light. Everywhere. And then I was on their ship. I couldn’t hear Bob anymore. And I felt these warm hands on my head and arms and legs. I was lying face-down on some kind of metal platform. Then I felt this sting on the back of my neck and things got real fuzzy for a while, I guess. When things cleared up again, I could hear Bob fussing in the background. I couldn’t tell what he was saying, but he didn’t sound unhappy or scared or anything. Then I was back in the field. And now I’m here.


–Right. So, where’s your key to get in?

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