Written by Markus Robinson, Edited by Nicole Ashland
Markus Rating: 3 out of 5 Stars
Rated R for strong violent/gruesome accidents, and some language
Not to sound like a sadomasochist or anything, but sometimes it’s just fun to go to the movies and watch some random teenagers (that you have no stock in) die in some of the most “mouse trap” inspired ways (all hate mail can be sent to [email protected]). Directed by — wait was I really going to credit the director for a film like “Final Destination 5″? Moving on:
Synopsis: Shockingly (that is sarcasm); there is not much in the way of story development in this fifth installment in the “Final Destination” franchise. The story follows a group of twenty-something’s or teens or twenty-something’s playing teens (from all different walks of life) that — blah blah blah, people get killed…in 3D! Ok the important premise that motivates this film is that these semi-unlikable characters cheat death and (one by one) all of the survivors must be brutally (but comically in some cases) killed for our viewing pleasure (It sounds harsh, but in this case it works. My explanation for this is forthcoming). With a franchise which is approaching “Rocky Horror Picture Show”, (yelling at the screen), territory, the way one enjoys a movie like this is by forgetting the nonsensical storyline altogether and focusing on the bloody, elaborate and off-the-wall ways that these kids meet their maker.
Why this film works: “Final Destination 5″ still has its soft core gore for gore’s sake mentality, but this time the franchise (now seemingly understanding what a joke it has become) has made its characters ridiculously aware of the horrifically serious situation that they have been put in and deal with it with dark humor, which makes the film more enjoyable to an audience that is made to feel as if they are in on the joke. The acting is horrendous, but who cares, because there is surprisingly a ton of suspense liberally sprinkled throughout, making the film engaging almost the whole way though. Many of the cartoonist fatalities are so outlandishly set up, that it is like watching the opening sequence of “PeeWee’s Big Adventure”, but that is all part of the fun here. The 3D thrills are forced (seriously there is a five minute intro that is all in 3D, but has nothing to do with the movie itself) and the storyline sucks, but for its intended purpose of delivering exemplary immediate horror gratification, “Final Destination 5″ WORKS on a very simplistic level.
Death in the “Final Destination” franchise vs. franchises such as “Saw” or all of the ultra violent horror remakes of today: Before you say that I am a blood-thirsty fan of torture-porn or something irrational like that, let me just stop you there and explain one thing. There are two types of violent horror films being made in this day and age. The first being the new age horror film aka your basic horror/thriller film; the second being the new age slasher film which is an angry, driven by blood and guts and gruesome murder, abominations of the basic horror/thriller film and a detriment on society to boot. As you can see, I am obviously a fan of the former:
1. The new age slasher: A film that is predicated on the simple theory that people want to see gore in their horror films. And while that may be true in most cases, in this day and age, “new age slashers” take that aspect one step further and (many times) throw storyline, character development or concept out the window all together, in order to bludgeon the audience over the head with ten more scenes of ultra violent gore that serves no purpose . Here is the deception of the “new age slasher”: People tend to mistake horror (something in the movie that scares the audience) with gore (not so much scary as gross and hard to watch), and Hollywood seems to invest in the theory that in order to make a horror film scarier, directors need to show victims being mutilated slowly (“Texas Chainsaw Massacre” remake 2003) or being defiled while being mutilated slowly (“The Hills Have Eyes” remake 2006). Where is the suspense in that?!
2. The new age horror: At first glance seems like the same thing as the new age slasher, but the difference in the “new age horror”, is that it is usually based in some kind of storyline or an inventive concept (Final Destination, Scream, The Descent). Even though there is much focus put on gore, it isn’t all about the deaths here, but more about everything leading up to it (the good ones anyways). Take a film such as “Final Destination 5″ that has a horrible storyline, but an interesting running premise; where the deaths are instant and more focus is put on the anticipation of the next character to die. The suspense is the meal or the meat of these types of films. And then compare it to films such as the “Saw(s)”, where the deaths are a gruesome five minute gore fests (at least). There is almost no suspense leading up to these deaths. In fact, the ultra-violent deaths are the meat of these types of films.
But it really is as simple as this: Even if you have no stake in a character in one of these films, it is hard to watch an entire movie exploiting the actual elongated suffering process of death. In the end, the (I hate to call it brilliance but — ) brilliance of the “Final Destination” films is how it makes B movie horrors fun again without being exploitive or vomit inducing (for better or for worse I guess).
Final Thought: The Bill Maher joke goes something to the effect of “The creators of the “Final Destination” films need to be locked in a room until they figure out what the word “final” means”, BUT in my opinion, if this is the direction that this particular franchise is headed (3D graphics aside) then hell, Hollywood should make five more. Riddled with tons of “Shock and Awe” factor death sequences, “Final Destination 5″ is definitely my guilty pleasure film of the year. All in all, this film wasn’t the total train wreck I thought it would be (and that is saying a lot), in fact I came out of the film having enjoyed my overall movie going experience. So, for anyone who has an affinity for the “Final Destination” franchise, this is a film worth checking out for some campy adult fun; otherwise you can probably skip it (simple as that).
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