What percentage of our actions are expected by others? Are we predictable to the extent that everything we do is no surprise to anyone? Sound boring? Most would think so, but I tend to think that we spend too much time trying to be predictable in certain areas. Isn’t that what we strive to do, predict our financial future with our 401K’s, IRA’s, and retirement accounts? Expect to have an accident or mishap and buy insurance, playing it safe, and planning for the expected. But isn’t that planning for the unexpected? Do we expect to die? Yes. Do we expect it to be tomorrow? No, not unless your on hospice and you’re saying your goodbyes to loved ones.
It’s a common thing to plan or expect all these things to happen to us, but on the other side of the coin, do we let the cautious behavior and rational thinking about finances, insurance, and life expectancy spill over into the other parts of our lives and make us slow down so much to not enjoy life? I expect certain things. We’re programmed that way. It’s what many people refer to as our comfort zone. It’s nice to have our friends cover our back, by calling and saying that we left our lights on, or the gate open, stuff like that. It’s nice to know that you can go home and have a nice comfy bed to get into after a hard day. But it’s not so easy or comfortable to have the unexpected occur.
Do you fear or embrace the unexpected? I think it’s parallel to whether you view a situation as a ‘cup half full or half empty’. I must say, with me, it depends on the pattern of recent events. If something starts my day off and makes me ‘fall off the wrong side of the bed’ then I think it’s normal to have that downer carry to the next thing. Would you agree that most are like this? How many times have we heard the huffs and sighs at work or school and you knew that someone was in a bad mood. And it always annoys these people when someone comes in the office so chipper that they can’t contain themselves. A lot of the time, my days can spin on a dime and go the complete opposite direction, and it changes my outlook, my mood (which sometimes irritates my wife), and the energy with which I approach the rest of the day.
About 10 years ago, I had a friend tell me that I can only be in control of how I react to others and events initiated by others. Sometimes that fact is lost within the confusion of the things that happen, and I forget to apply it to my own reactions. Maybe I should expect more positive reactions of myself than I do of others. All of this can apply to every aspect of our lives. I admit that I get my roles as a parent, friend, husband mixed up sometimes. I think some people also don’t get the difference between those roles, and importance of separating them. What I expect as a parent of my kids, is quite different of what I expect from a friend, or my spouse. But how I react to both the expected and unexpected defines, in most cases, how I am received and what pattern I have displayed to others, that influence the amount of positive interaction I have with others.
Life is way too short to think of the cup half empty, I think I’ll just expect the unexpected and smile!!!!! That’s something I can control, no matter how unexpected by others.