Just Because!

Have you ever had that argument or contentious response and ended up saying, JUST BECAUSE! Communication is a tricky thing for some, myself included, and it can be a great asset to ones character, or a liability. Sometimes patience pays an important part in whether or not we become frustrated enough to use those words, just because. I find that most of the time I am looking at a situation and I think I am the superior person (maybe by being experienced with the subject) and expect the other person to be the inferior person in the conversation. Yes, I’m referring to my kids in this instance. But how much do we find ourselves unable to differentiate between our roles as a parent, and when dealing with our peers, and hopefully that would mean other adults.

I take my role as a parent as the greatest responsibility that I will ever have. Now before you think that I’m going to dole out some parenting advise, I’m only asking you to just consider what level your communication skills are, and do you feel that you should have a different set of rules for self governing yourself when dealing with different groups in your life. I would advocate that it is difficult to be a parent and a friend to one of your children, at least until you’ve finished raising your kids and they are supporting themselves and not leaning on the parent for substantial logistical and financial assistance. We are teachers to our children (by example) whether or not we want it to be that way. Studies have shown that the vast majority of learning is done via the parent child relationship. It’s hard for me to slow down sometimes and give the kids a chance to show me what they’ve learned from my guidance, and I also find that I treat others outside my family circle with those same mores. This isn’t always the best way to interact with others.

Leading by example always seems to be a recommended trait of leaders. I try to do that, but sometimes others just don’t catch on as to why. Shouldn’t they see? It’s obvious to me! And in the absence of plenty of time or when I’m in a hurry, I find myself lacking patience and blurting out, JUST BECAUSE! meaning two things, I don’t have the time or desire to explain myself. Now, understanding the time thing is easy, all can understand that. But, that desire thing is where I usually find myself in a quandary, or for Southerners, a pickle. I can’t help but think that a lot of life is navigated with common sense, meaning that if I see a mop bucket and a wet mop in action in a school hallway, I automatically use caution knowing that it is likely wet and hazardous. We all know of people who are lacking in this department. But as stated in an earlier post that’s where expectations come into play. Due to my expectations, I usually, and sometimes incorrectly assume that it’s obvious why I don’t give an explanation to a directive.

I hope that someone gives me an explanation when I don’t understand something, if for no other reason than JUST BECAUSE.

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