Who is it? Who do you spend the most time with? Is it yourself or someone special? Some may spend most of their time with someone that they totally dislike, while others (like me) get the chance to spend it with their best friend. Quality of time spent with someone that you choose may have a lot to do with your outlook on life. Similar to the idea that if you love your job then you don’t really have to go to work. I sometimes can’t believe myself when I complain, well, about anything. And in my case, it comes down to time, and how I choose to use it, and who I choose to spend it with, which determines my general level of happiness.
One of the most important things I try to teach my children is this: Every action and choice has a consequence! Only time is the judge of both, sometimes the consequence comes quickly and some take years and years to tell. But in the end, all we have is the legacy of how we spent our time. Consequences are usually described in a negative light, but there are equal if not more positive results from our decisions. Most of the time I think that what I decide should be positive for others, but that’s not always going to be the case. And in this sense, that’s what makes the world go around, we all have opinions, and you know the rest of that one.
Some people think that they ‘did all they could’ in decisions they made as a parent or spouse, and still ‘look what happened to my marriage’, or ‘look how little Johnny turned out’. I hardly find those comments to be little more than excuses allowing them to pass the blame on to someone else when, in fact, in some cases those comments may have something to do with guilt from the lack of spending time with their children, or their spouse. But because we can’t predict the future doesn’t excuse us from being responsible with our decisions as we move forward as friends, spouses, and especially parents.
I hope that anyone reading this is smart enough to recognize that I haven’t mentioned anything about material things or money. The most memorable times I have as a youth had nothing to do with anything except, who I was with. It simply wasn’t that noteworthy if I couldn’t remember who was involved. I hope my children and friends notice my time management choices. And I certainly hope my children learn from my mistakes too.
As our children grow, we can see opportunities on a daily basis to teach and encourage, but it’s how we ALLOW them to experience the consequences that shape them as young adults. So, how much time have you spent with your children? Are they the most important, second only to your spouse? Do you allow your children to experience life, or do you try to fix everything for them?
What are the consequences that they will reap from the investment of time we spend with them, or lack of it? Maybe it’s a variable that we can’t quantify, but one we can definitely recognize. Have you ever been in the presence of a child or even an adult and you can see how obvious it is that they didn’t receive a proper investment of time from the parents? I don’t have any definitive answers except to suggest that it is never a bad idea to invest in your child’s future by spending your time on them. When your children or your spouse are telling your grandchildren who was most involved with them, well, who is it? Are you going to be the answer?